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Log inHi. Your opening line doesn't make sense the way it is written. Perhaps you could say something like Within the land that is separated from the rest of the world, in the middle of the day, its people are spotted, etc. It flows better if you combine the thought of the first line with the second. Just a suggestion. I applaud you for writing a book in a language that is not your first and l know English can be hard and doesn't follow the rules. :)
Director West., I wasn't meaning it as you disappointed me. No need to apologize. I was just giving you some feedback. I imagine it must be hard writing a book in a language that is not your first. I'm just here to help you out and give you pointers. Us writers need to have each other's backs and help each other out:)
It would be easier to read if you add a line or two of space between each quote and new paragraphs.
Director West., No worries. Just some suggestions.
I am afraid this Tessel would create problem in the future.
am afraid too!
your stories are always so original
Director West., welcome
she´s almost a master of visions
Just started reading this story and wanted to let you know that I enjoy it very much. Added it to my library and followed you. Would you please consider following back? And if you like action-adventure fantasy stories then I welcome you to check out my ongoing books. Thanks
Thanks for checking out my story. Would you please consider following back?
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