After having supper with Devin, the next week went really quickly. Work filled up most of my time, and the rest of my free time was filled with raising Teddy. It's finally weekend and I have the weekend to myself. Sebastian, my brother is taking Teddy for a fishing weekend, so I'm free. Devin has gone down to Atlanta to sort out a few work things, which leaves me to do whatever the hell I want to. Which actually consists of me, lying on my couch, watching Netflix, and getting fat with the amount of sweet stuff I'm eating.
As the show I'm watching comes to an end, I walk upstairs, have a quick shower and pull on jeans, a hoodie as well as some combat boots simply because I feel like it. I grab my handbag, and car keys and drive to the mall. I want a good book. I'm feeling bookish today.
I walk towards the nearest bookstore until I see the one person who I never thought I would see again. There he was. He was dressed casually, he was wearing a cap and what seemed to be fake glasses, to try and disguise himself as he did once. Dylan. There he was walking straight towards me. I spin around quickly and hope he does notice me. I walk into the nearest shop, which unfortunately has to be a woman's underwear shop. Dammit, Alex.
I try to walk back out without him seeing me, but as I'm about to walk in the store, I hear him call my name.
"Alex." He says simply. It holds no meaning really. It's more like a greeting, but I haven't heard it in two months, after seeing each other almost very day and then not seeing each other for over two months, things get weird. Very quickly.
"Hi Dylan." I smile or at least try to. I'm not in the mood for this.
"Buying underwear are you?" He asks, almost sceptical that I came in her to actually purchase something, and rightfully so. I'm glad that I didn't decide to become an actress. Trust me. I thought about it.
"Umm..." I start. He smirks, happy to have found me out.
"You were avoiding me weren't you?" He points out, and I grimace. Damn. I did it again. "Why?" He chuckles, "Do I smell bad?" He tries to lighten the mood, but I can feel he already knows the answer. He hurt me, and he knows he did it on purpose.
"Would you like to have coffee with me, sometime?" He asks, "To catch up?"
"I can't." I say quickly.
"You can't or you won't?" He asks. I scratch my arm awkwardly.
"You're married?" He asks, looking at my ring. My ring. I forgot about my ring. A perfect explanation.
"No, I'm soon to be though." I smile, he looks taken aback. Shocked even.
"Engaged?" He seems to test the word on his tongue. "Engaged." He declares as if he can't quite believe it.
"Engaged." I say softly. I feel like I have somehow let him down. As if I should've told him, or called to say hi. The look on his face is unreadable. I can't quite place it. It's a mixture of shock and something that looks like betrayal. Did I betray him? No. How could I? He got himself a girlfriend, we weren't even dating for goodness sake. Sure we had one date, or two, but that's not serious, did he think I would wait for him to get his act in order?
"To whom?" He asks finally after minutes of silence.
"Devin. My boyfriend who I broke up with. We got back together and he proposed." I explain, admiring the ring.
"Oh." That's all he says. Oh. The word that can describe subtle shock, realisation, heartbreak, or understanding. The word that describes a mixture of feelings all in two letters. It can sometimes come out as bitter, and it's an awkward way to end a conversation.
"How's um... Cathy?" I ask, her name is no longer bitter on my tongue as it used to be. It's like I no longer care.
"Who?" He asks. Flip it.
"The girl you went to the Christmas party with? The one you called your girlfriend?" He still looks confused.
"What the hell Dylan?" I state shocked. He used her, and no matter how much I had previously disliked her, I actually felt sorry for her. "You used her." I state. He shrugs. "You freaking jerk!" I start shouting now, I don't know why, but I'm angry. "Why would you do that? Girls aren't just trophies that once you have them, you can just toss them away. They aren't just another notch in your belt. They have feelings and they have hearts that can get broken. How could you Dylan? I thought you were better than that." The last part came out as a whisper, while the rest was more of a burst out than anything else.
"Don't you see Alex," He starts, but pauses for a minute, "The girl I want doesn't want me back, and there are so many other girls out there that do want me, so why the hell not?"
"It's refreshing, isn't it? To want something you can't get. That one girl must be the most intelligent woman alive. Why can't others see that inside, to your very bones, is none other than an insecure man who uses women to feed his ego? I don't get it." I state.
Dylan laughs, no, he chuckles. "You think you know me, Alexander? You think you have me all figured out?" He questions, still smirking, "I have you all figured out! You are devastated by the loss of your sister, that you overwhelmed yourself with work that you wouldn't have to think about her every single day of your miserable clique life. When your boyfriend left to Atlanta, you got so caught up in trying to forget him that you ran to me. The very thing you accuse me of doing, and then suddenly, everything goes back together again, all perfect, and you can go back to your perfect little life. But you don't like the way it all turned out, do you? Do you Alexander?" He mocks, "You are insecure about every aspect of yourself. I can see it. I can see right through your big act. You act like you haven't fallen for me, but you have! I can see it in your face. I've won Alexander. I've won and you've lost! Isn't it sad? I even had to pay for your college fees that quite sad isn't it? You feel so angry for whoever that girl is because you know that you became the same thing! Another notch in my belt!"