The Highest Summit

Chapter 18: Proud and scared all at once

Sam

I hurry to get to Bobbi. I’m angry that Adele hurt her, I’m upset that her brother and friends don’t really know the amazing person she is, I’m pissed with Marisol for saying these awful things about her, I’m glad our principal revealed some of the great things she did, I’m hurt that Bobbi didn’t call me sooner, but I’m happy she called me in the end. I park my car in my drive way and hurry to the Moore’s house. I knock on the door and Bobbi opens it. She looks like she’d been crying. I pull her in my arms and hold her close. I breathe in her scent and I instantly calm down.

“Let’s go to your room,” I say and we walk upstairs, my arm securely around her. She keeps her head low, as if she is ashamed, even though there’s nothing she has to be ashamed of. We go inside her room and she sits down on her bed. I sit next to her and she leans against my shoulder. “I’m sorry for what happened,” I say. I am.

“It’s not your fault. I overreacted and when I came to realize that it was too late. And I’m sorry it took me so long to text you,” she says still looking down. I wrap my right arm around her keeping her close and hold her hands in my left one.

“No, babe, you didn’t. You are different and Adele should accept that and not try to change it. As it happens, I really like this Bobbi and not some Barbie doll version of her,” I say with a chuckle and she laughs lightly.

“Thanks. What about that rumor?” she asks.

“What about it? Someone who is jealous made up some fucked up lie to hurt you. But anyone who knows you knows that it isn’t true. Bobbi, you are amazing, kind, loving, smart and funny. I pity everyone who doesn’t know this already. I love you,” I tell her and she finally looks up, tears streaming down her face. “Don’t cry, baby.” I lean down and kiss her softly. She wraps her arms around my neck and I hold her tightly. I let her cry and lean back on her bed. This isn’t the first time we do this. Sometimes after she had a nightmare she calls me and I sneak out of my house and come over here. I climb up her window and stay with her until she falls asleep again. When her tears finally subside we sit across from each other on the bed, just staring at the other and not saying anything. I want to ask her what she is thinking, but I know she will answer that question when she’s ready.

“I’m really trying to be more like a regular girl, but I feel like I’m losing myself,” she says.

“Bobbi, you don’t have to do anything you are not comfortable doing,” I reassure her. “Just because Adele or anyone tells you to be something you are not, doesn’t mean you have to do it. I’ve told you, I love you just the way you are. People should like you for you and not for something you pretend to be.”

“I know, Sam, but I feel like I’m the freak and that’s what I actually am. I don’t fit in,” she argues.

“Bobbi, maybe that’s a good thing,” I say and she gives me a questioning look. “Think about it. Did it ever bother you that you are different?” I ask and she shakes her head. “Would you want to be different? I mean in your heart is it that what you want?” She shakes her head again. “Then ignore them. They don’t know half of the amazing things you’ve seen and done. They think pretty dresses and school dances are important, but they haven’t seen the world the way you did. You literally stood on top of everything and you are still this amazing young woman, grounded, humble, sweet and beautiful. I wouldn’t change a single thing about you,” I tell her and she smiles, the few tears that run down her cheek make her look even more lovely than usual. I stretch out my hand to wipe them away but she shakes her head.

“Let them fall. I want them to wash this whole thing away,” she says. I nod. She crawls into my arms and we stay like that, in each other’s arms, for a long while.

“You wanna grab a bite to eat?” I ask her. I haven’t eaten since lunch and the hunger monster inside me demands attention. She laughs lightly and nods her head.

“Let’s go out for burgers,” she says.

Fifteen minutes later we are in our favorite burger place, me eating a king sized chilly burger and Bobbi a double, no onions, cheeseburger. We each get a milkshake and a soda. We eat in silence, mainly because Bobbi has something on her mind, but doesn’t know how to tell me. I let her be. I know she will eventually tell me when she finds the right words. We finish eating and Bobbi keeps staring at me. I swallow down my questions and let her think. She sighs loudly and I just can’t take the waiting and tension anymore.

“Wanna share?” I ask casually.

“I wanna go,” she says. I look at her confused.

“Okay,” I say and get up.

“Sit down. I didn’t mean now.”

“Okay,” I say confused.

“I wanna go to Argentina. In December. To climb the mountain,” she announces.

“Are you sure?” I ask her. I know she is. She wouldn’t have told me otherwise.

“Yes. What do you think?” she asks, taking me by surprise.

“Uhm, I think it’s your decision,” I say honestly.

“Sam, I know it’s my decision, but we are a couple. I want to know what you think. And be honest with me,” she says.

“Alright.” I remain silent for a moment. I want to tell her not to go, because I’m scared something might happen to her. But at the same time I’m afraid she will resent me if I ask her not to go. It would also be hypocritical of me given that not two hours ago I told her to not give a damn about what other people think or say. She should be herself and mountain climbing allows her to be that.



cloakseeker

#738 in Young adult

Story about: romance, teenagers, ptsd

Edited: 05.02.2019

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