AFTER 4 YEARS
I can't accept the fact that Dad died yesterday and he left us with a 5 million debt in some bank I don't know its name. Or maybe it only slipped on my mind.
Actually, I came home as early as I can straight from the airport. I came from France where I study for 2 years and had my job there permanently for 2 years. I work in a call center there and graduated Cum Laude in fine arts in France.
This was the first time that I come back here in the country where I was born and I didn't intend to see the last days of dad in his coffin.
My eyes became blurry when I look at you
And so as my heart how it feels
The stars that you had for me has gone away
By your words I've been compromised...
I can't keep my tears from flowing at my cheeks. I love my dad so much and it hurts me like a knife stabs my heart. He was my protector, my savior, my escort, my dad, my everything...How did someone have the guts to kill my father who can't protect himself alone?
Then suddenly there was a drizzle.
My dad's coffin started to pull down as his second family threw the flowers to his grave.
Mom silently grieve for my father while Auntie Mercy—dad's second wife—cried aloud. I smiled at the thought of them having no child.
When it was my turn to throw the flower I held for a long time I think, the rain started to pour on my head. Then someone open up an umbrella. I don't know the reason why I want to feel the rain in my skin, in my body. Maybe I want to feel the pain alone.
"It's getting darker and darker, Madam. We need to get this down fast. The news said there's a super typhoon who will enter at this hour." the one who slide down the rope said.
I sigh deeply and throw the flower I held and turn my back. I don't want to see Dad in this situation.
I begged you to please stay
But you looked down and runaway
All the sacrifices I've done for you
They all turn to dust now
And they're everywhere...
"Damn that song!! Will you stop playing that??!!" I shouted angrily as I sat in one of the chairs, only to face someone across me.
"There's no song playing, darling!" he was now tear-eyed as he continued "I'm sorry..."
"That's all you can say? I'm sorry? Your sorry won't back what had happen, Rav." I can't help but be sarcastic. "For the last years of my life I felt miserable not to say goodbye at you. But all along you were there in your resthouse in Baguio!! You didn't even care to explain what had happened that night that you didn't show up!!!"
"I'm sorry, darling."—Rav
"That's all you can say? Well dad's right. You didn't deserve to be my boyfriend. All along dad is right but I didn't believe him." I stand up and went straight to my car I drove since I came from the airport.
Because its raining hard, it causes traffic and flash flood all over the streets. I arrived late in our old house. Actually its a 20-minute drive from the sanctuary to our house. But because of it, I got stuck for 2 hours.
"Is this all your things, Ari?"nanny Jesa asked
"Yes, nanny."then I pouted
"Don't be that sad, Ari. It's only a challenge and we an get over this soon."
"How? Where will I get that 5 million in 3 days time? I-I don't know what to do!"
"Just calm down, okay? I'll get your dinner downstairs."the she left me in my room.
"SAME OLD ROOM, SAME OLD HOUSE, SAME OLD MEMORIES...gET LOST, WILL YOU?" I whispered. I can't control myself, my emotion from rushing down specially this time that I had many problem.
I let myself drift off to sleep as my problem fade in my mind....