Red Chevrolet drove up to the Ibiza nightclub, the most fashionable and expensive institution in Kyiv. A hefty, bald man who works here as a security guard, took up his post. He adjusted the collar of his shirt, shook off the dust, or something else from one sleeve, and ran a hand over his head as if straightening his hair. Remembering that he lost that value right after school, the security staff sighed sadly. Now he would give everything to have at least the dullest and thin hair, covered even with a thick layer of dandruff. After all, he read somewhere that only ten percent of women fall for bald men. And the guard was very doubtful that the ten percent included a girl whom he secretly loved. She often came here with friends or with her boyfriends. She, such a beauty, who she was, of course, did not notice him, such a bald big man. All her gentlemen had luxurious hair, thick purses, and expensive cars. And he didn’t even have a bicycle. Although he could afford it. There was simply no desire. But to have a big jeep was a desire. However, he could not afford it.
“Vanya, look who came!” Said the second guard, coming out of the club, pointing with his hand the direction. Ivan immediately descended from heaven to earth. “Your fifa rolled! And in what campaign! Wow!” The guy whistled, having pulled out a pack of cigarettes from a pocket.
The doors of the scarlet Chevrolet opened. From there, incendiary music and loud female laughter were heard. Seconds later, four girls got out of the car. Everyone was charmingly beautiful! Each girl was fitted with a short dress. On all legs sandals with ten-centimeter hairpins flaunted. Each beauty was in trendy war paint and dark tan, from which not a single man could resist.
“All Viagra in its entire staff!” The valet added, who still stood silently in the shade. “There are and Alena Vinnitskaya, and Nadezhda Meyher, and even the last one ... Well, the one who took part in the factory of stars! Do you remember? What’s her name?”
“Eva Bushmina, it seems,” answered Vanya.
“In a word - little white, little black and little red one!” The second guard concluded.
“Such girls are without protection!” The parking attendant was surprised.
“So they have a hen party!” The second guy grunted, lighting a cigarette. “Probably, some of these colored fifas has already caught some poor fellow into their marriage nets! They will come off in full this night, as if for the last time! There will be a martini, and vodka with beer, there will be tobacco and a hookah with wheels! In addition to all this, there will be also a stripper macho with a fig leaf in a forbidden place, and for an additional fee even without it! And then for a double fee, you can rent the macho himself for the night!” He added, taking a puff. “For all four!”
“Igor, stop talking nonsense!” Ivan was angry because his colleague at work poured mud on his beloved girl. “Not everyone is like your ex!”
“Yes, all the women are such!” The guy threw a cigarette in the trash can. “I do not consider grey mice to be women!” He added quickly, guessing that his partner would now begin to divide the women into decent and dishonorable.
“You are wrong, Igor,” Ivan could not agree with the opinion of his comrade. “There are women ...”
“And your favorite fifa doesn’t look like a mouse, so she’s a bitch!”
“Don't call her like that!” Ivan was angry in earnest. “She is the most beautiful woman in the world!”
“Calm down, Vanya! You're right. She may be the most amazing girl even in the whole universe, but the fact remains she is a bitch with all her "bitch" habits! And there is only one conclusion - she is the same bitch as my former Lena, and Katia, and Ania, and so on and so forth!
“Igor, stop blaming the girls for your own mistakes,” Ivan continued to defend the honor of all women in the world, especially one of them, his beloved Olechka. “If all your exes find a replacement for you while are still with you, then it is no a problem in them, but in you.” So, you are not able to give them as much love as they require!”
“What!” Igor got angry, clenching his fists. “You’ve just called me impotent?! Well, hold on, friend!”
Ivan and the parking man froze in place. Igor looked as if he was ready to explode. Ivan was expecting his partner to pounce on him now, but he stopped halfway to him. He turned to the amused girls and headed towards them.
“Hey, lahudras!” He turned to them. “What are you selling for today?!”
The girls were dumbfounded by what they heard.
“I give a hundred for each!” Igor continued meanwhile. “And for the little black, I’ll pay twice! This is a present for you, Vania, from me!” He turned to a stunned partner. “Stop secretly drooling! We must take the bull by the horns, in our case - by the boobs!” Igor burst out laughing. “Believe me, there is something to grab!” He added, grinning impudently, while licking his lips, his eyes wide on what was below the neck of a woman.
“I'm afraid, boy, you won’t have anything to pay for half a year such lahudras like us if I call your boss!” The redhead answered first, as if nothing had happened, as if she had not been doused a few seconds ago with slop from head to toe.